‘America’s Got Talent’ review: ‘Booty Song’ 2.0, Forte, Ciana Pelekai lead live show 2

Going into “America’s Got Talent” this week, our expectations were actually somewhat low given the roster for the night. We had two danger acts that can do so similar things, a bunch of dance-related groups that we’ve barely seen all season, a young singer who is pretty good but not amazing, and then one awesome opera trio topping it all off. We also ranked the “Booty Song” guys last, but immediately regretted that decision the moment we saw that the producers seriously put them last on the show.

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Innovative Force – This name is awful. They’ve basically took two very abstract concepts and put them into a name, expecting that we would remember them. Ironically, we are going to remember them for what matters: Their talent. This was a pleasant surprise! The only person worthy of an X was that cameraman for not actually knowing where to actually shoot (such as pointing on one person when there were around 25 other people doing something more exciting).

Ciana Pelekai – She’s going to need them here. She sang “Next To Me” pretty well … but did she really choose this song? It’s like Emeli Sande has been giving this song away for free for talent shows to use, and it’s not something we really picture singing at home. Had she taken on a different song, our praise would have been higher.

Alexandr Magala – You have to love an inspirational performer, right? It’s hard to really combine inspiration with a guy nearly murdering himself. Someone needs to seriously dry the Radio City Music Hall stage before the guy goes on, though: It was slick, and sliding all over the place with a sword in your mouth isn’t easy. Plus, he had an injury from a couple of days before and hasn’t been able to eat. Dude may not win the show, but he’s a total boss either way.

Struck Boyz – First of all, is comparing yourself to the cast of “Jersey Shore” really that smart of an idea. Yeah, we’re not so sure about that. Much too risky when you consider that most of the world hates them and now they’ve practically vanished. The dancing here was okay, but it was all just too obnoxious for our taste. It was to us the perfect example of some young kids getting by on their personality perhaps more so than the actual talent.

Brad Byers – While Alexandr has some sort of real discernible talent to what he does, Brad’s talent just seems to be pure insanity. He likes to nearly kill himself in front of millions of people! There’s not a lot of skill here; it’s really just crazy, and the danger isn’t even that exciting because his personality is a bit like your friend’s dad who offers to make you pancakes after a sleepover.

Kid the Wiz – First, we hate these packages that make it look like these people are kept from robbing banks or doing something horrible by their talent. It’s annoying. The talent here is pretty cool, but he dropped the hat again! You can’t drop the hat at this point and expect to get through to the next round. If nothing else, at least he has the suggestion that Howard Stern made about that sneaker commercial … and that “towel” comment from Howie Mandel. (Ew.)

Forte – Opera singers on this show are almost always amazing, since there’s no other outlet for them, and so they all audition for this show, but these three are the best trio that’s ever been on the show’s stage. Great harmonies, no cheese, and chemistry for days despite barely knowing each other. It’s like the three did some long-distance dating and just decided to go get ice cream … except they followed up that date with a trip to Radio City Music Hall.

Angela Hoover – We don’t mean to be in the gutter here, but did Nick Cannon really know what he was saying when he asked for applause here? Go back and watch the tape, since we’re too squeamish to write it here. Anyhow, Angela was pretty funny and entertaining, but not spectacular. We’ve heard dozens of better comics / impressionists, and while we hate to say it, we think her story is part of what got her here.

Dave Shirley – This is on our top five list of things we hate seeing on this show: A middle-aged guy deciding that taking his clothes off on live TV is funny. It’s not. It’s desperate. The technology thing is cool, and it is a pretty funny idea for a few seconds … but that’s it. There was no novelty to it this time, and it wasn’t funny. It made Angela’s act look like going to watch Sarah Silverman live. We like Dave a lot, but giving up that teaching job right now may have not been the best move.

Marty Brown – This felt like something that Marty should have done for his wife back at home, with no cameras on. If nothing else, he wins an award for being a great husband. He definitely is not going to get one from singing here. It was pretty terrible: The notes were off-key, he looked completely lost, and he should have just sat up there and played a song with his guitar. This is something that you do have to blame the show for somewhat, since that emotional pre-show package totally wrecked him. Why do this before the contestant starts to sing?

Aquanuts – Okay, so first of all we have to throw some major hate on Howard Stern for saying that nobody cares about synchronized swimming. We smell a boycott by all swimmers of “The Howard Stern show” coming up. They are very, very good at what they do, which is an incredibly hard thing to actually pull off and pull off well. Now, could there really be a full show in Las Vegas about this? Maybe it could be a component, but not a full show. It is still miles better than Marty Brown squawking about his wife on stage.

Tone the Chiefrocca – We can’t stop laughing. Seriously. It’s so stupid, but yet so incredibly awesome that it was the best moment of the entire show. We completely forget everything we said in the rankings: We want to see this again! If nothing else, it’s just amazing for the comedy of seeing this guy and his terrible hype man coming on stage every episode and doing the same song that we’ve already heard a million times thanks to YouTube. We also love how excited he gets whenever Mel B talks about her booty.

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Photo: NBC