NBC rebrands to ‘Nothing But Chicago,’ moves ‘The Blacklist,’ ‘The Voice,’ and more

Breaking news is coming out on Friday afternoon — after starting to see some early raw footage from the backdoor “Chicago PD” pilot for “Chicago Justice,” NBC is starting to realize that there is still, somehow, more untapped potential in the Windy City. Sure, we’ve gotten to know how the city’s residents fight fires, solve crimes, save lives, and hook up / break up with each other at a fairly rapid pace … but can they sing? That’s what executives are desperate to find out.

Therefore, NBC is undergoing a massive overhaul for the upcoming fall season, and are even changing their abbreviation to stand for Nothing But Chicago. Many of your favorite shows are moving production to Chicago, and you may see a few changes to their format as a result.

“Chicago Voice” – Can contestants get a chair to turn around for these new coaches? NBC is hiring Chicago talents Jennifer Hudson, Kanye West, Common, and for some reason Oprah Winfrey to be the new coaches for the show. President Obama is in talks to host, but it may be delayed until midseason to accommodate his scheduling concerns. Rumor has it that Severide may be the frontrunner to win this season, as he plans on auditioning with new love interest Nora (Lady Gaga).

“Chicago Blacklist” – Raymond Reddington comes to Chicago after a nasty split with the FBI Task Force, and tries to adopt Burgess as his new Elizabeth Keen. Voight spends the first five episodes trying to hunt him down and arrest him, but an unlikely bromance forms and they spend the rest of the season going to Bulls games and debating who has a better crew of ragtag informants.

“The Mysteries of Laura in Chicago” – Debra Messing’s Laura moves to Chicago, and upon realizing that there are no job openings at Intelligence or anywhere else as a detective, spends her days trying to stage a musical. Midway through the season, the show changes its name to “Chicago Smash.”

“Chicago’s Grimm” – Nick and Hank find their way to the Windy City, and quickly realize that there are no supernatural cases for them to solve. With that in mind, they spend the remainder of the season trying to solve the enigma that is the city’s “grim” weather. NBC may fire someone a week after the premiere for the terrible pun in this title.

“Chicago Hannibal” – Jesse Spencer spends his entire “Chicago Fire” paycheck to revive the canceled show, hoping that Casey could cross over as Will Graham’s new BFF. Instead, Will turns him over to Hannibal, and NBC decides to cancel the show again before all of 51 becomes a main ingredient in the firehouse chili.

Executives also bandying about some other crossover ideas: Herrmann uses Molly’s for “Chicago Voice” auditions, while the “Chicago Med” team is on hand for the string of injuries on “Chicago Ninja Warrior.” (Rumor has it that Olinsky is surprisingly flexible!) Meanwhile, Red finds himself cast in Debra Messing’s Chicago musical and the new ‘ship “Raura” is born. A ten-part crossover could be attempted, and there are considerations to bring in the cast of “The Night Shift” to help care for the characters who all pass out from exhaustion.

Also, Sunday Night Football. The Bears play themselves every week, and still find a way to lose.

There’s no planned launch date for any of these new shows, though we hear that if they are not able to get the rebrand together in time, they may try once more on April 1, 2017 … provided that the ratings for these shows are still strong.