‘Survivor Caramoan: Fans vs. Favorites’: Jeff Probst sizes up the full cast

Over the course of the past several weeks, we have sized up all of the returning players on “Survivor Caramoan: Fans vs. Favorites” in terms of what they did the first time around, and the sort of changes they need to make to their games in order to actually win the million bucks this time around. However, it has been a little more difficult to size up the Fans given that they are all newbies, and all we have to go on are tiny two-minute videos released by CBS.

With that in mind, we’re going to defer to Jeff Probst in the new video below in order to explain what some of these people are like. While we don’t have impressions on everyone just yet, there are a few people that do very much stand out above the crowd:

1. Matt Bischoff – No man should be as obsessed with their beard as this guy is. You almost get a feeling that it’s really all he talks about. If this guy was on “Big Brother,” somebody would totally shave this off in the middle of the night. Regardless, this guy screams Billy Garcia 2.0: an outcast on his tribe from day 1 that’ll be gone the first change his tribe goes to vote somebody off.

2. Hope Driskill – Another pageant girl. Ugh. Every one of these people since Amanda Kimmel has been to us a massive disappointment.

3. Damon Lindelof Michael Snow – One of the only people on this tribe that we can guarantee is an actual fan.

4. Sharmar Thomas – It’s always fun to watch how these sort of ultra alpha males do, especially since we’re not sure there has been a military may like him on in over ten seasons. (We don’t really count Jerry Sims, who left because of bad beans.)

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Photo: CBS